Thanks to Zagats We Are Now The Main Course

I don’t know if Zagats is even around any more since websites like Yelp, OpenTable, and even Google to some extent have come along.  In some respects I wish it would have a revival.  Social places like Yelp and the like are so annoying since most of the people on these websites I don’t really want to hear what they think.  These people are not professionals.  Ninety-nine percent of them have never gone to culinary school and so these idiots complain about the smallest thing or what thing the waiter was or wasn’t doing really doesn’t matter since earlier that day this internet genius was probably sucking on Twinkies and playing World of Warcraft for 14 hours.  Just because they can hide behind the anonymity of the internet with user names like “Warlock55” and “JingleBell88,” they think they can trash a whole business with real people who went to a real school and have real jobs, because Warlock55 didn’t get asked if he wanted another refill of his Dr. Pepper.  Bring back the newspaper staff writer that gets paid to review these places.  As it stands right now, business owners are living in fear of every customer because they don’t know which customer is going to walk through the door and pick a fight so they can Yelp about it later.  Now all it takes is one Warlock55 to decide that he’s had enough crap from everyone and that he wants to complain and make the entire staff of the business miserable by yelling and make a scene.  He’ll raise his voice and swear up a storm.  He’ll huff and puff and storm out taking his tirade into the streets as if a whole parade might break out behind him singing his cause.  But why stop there?  Warlock55 now takes to the internet and posts his negative review all over the internet and even hires SEO consultants to help promote his horrible review.

What we really need is a website where the customers are reviewed.  Think about it.  The business has no recourse.    How do you fight Warlock55?  I say build a website where you can take snap shots or video of the customer in the middle of their complaining and post that on the web.  Reviews might go something like this.

“Today Warlock55 came into my place of business.  I was deeply sorry to serve him since he was a grouch right from the start.  He frowned at my greeting and stuck his nose up at my offering to take his coat.  He smelled of Hot Pockets and onion rings which made my nose curdle.  He must have seen my eyes watering and the sour facial expression because it made him burst into a cry of bloody murder.  “How dare you spray air freshener while you walk past me!”  He protested.  I will never serve Warlock55 since clearly his hygiene was subpar, he was a horrible tipper, and he scared many of my loyal and good customers.”

Yes sir, I say bring on the customer review website.  Let the business owner fight back!  Take back your established business and your building of the American dream.



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